Waiting for.....Godot?

Waiting. We've all done it. Exam results. Dental receptions. Doctor's surgeries. The new Harry Potter. There are different sorts of waiting - excited, apprehensive, bored. Well, I'm doing the bloody terrified sort at the moment. Test results. Future treatment plans. Like I said - bloody terrified. The sort of waiting where you pick up a book to distract you and have to read each sentence about three times before it sinks in. The sort of waiting where you look at the clock every two hours only to realise that just five minutes have passed.
I've tried thrillers, page turners, bodice rippers, and I'm still waiting. And still the terror lurks. Please tell me the most gripping book there is (and preferably the longest most gripping book there is) and I will try it. I will try anything. (Well, maybe not quite anything. A librarian does have standards, you know.)
People seem to pass time in libraries, but that is not really an option for me - my fingers would start to itch, and I would have to tidy something.
So.

I'm waiting.

In sickness and in health...

Apologies for the lack of post this last couple of weeks, but I have had shocking news, swiftly followed by surgery to remove said shocking news. I will draw a veil over the details, but suffice to say that books and libraries were not at the forefront of my mind, and may not be for a while. And yet, and yet....I did pack a book in my hospital overnight bag, because it did even then seem essential. And I did enter into an eager conversation with a fellow patient who was reading Grisham - "Bloody awful stuff but it gets you through the night" was the verdict. And I was amused to find a hospital library, even though I did not have cause to use it. I would be pleased and interested to hear from any hospital librarians out there - apart from anything else, what state are the books in - I know what your average public library book has stuck on its pages, so I dread to think what a hospital library book may be like. I am not too young to remember when librarians had to be notified of infectious diseases in their borrowers...
Anyway I will endeavour to keep posting as much as possible - any tips for get well reading, or the importance of books at times of crisis, most welcome.

Winter wonderland

Have you noticed, good people, that as the nights draw in, as the days grow colder, the library changes subtly? If you are very lucky, the heating will come on, and work. If you are unlucky, it will come on occasionally, in certain rooms, so the men reading their papers are quietly toasted, while the knitting group upstairs have to huddle around a small electric heater for comfort. I have often thought that if we could harness all the energy produced in our mother and toddler group we could probably power the lights and the kettle all day. (Well maybe not the kettle - our tea and coffee consumption increases to gargantuan proportions during the winter).
It also looks different when those corners, normally illuminated by daylight, are suddenly plunged into four o'clock dark, and look increasingly attractive to the teenagers who hang around the park in the summer, but need somewhere warm for the winter. We also seem to have an increase in tramps, and rather oddly, crosswords that are neglected in the summer months find themselves mysteriously complete in the winter.
And the books - the weighty tomes that are too heavy for summer suitcases disappear off the shelves in the winter. What better time to try Ulysses for the sixth time than a gloomy Tuesday in November when there is nothing on the telly? Some people even like to find out what sort of spider has crept in to their bedroom in the dead of night.
So, libraries are not immune to the winter chill or the evening gloom, but you might just find a haven and a tonic to get you through the season. Or possibly a warm corner to hibernate in.

All that glitters.....

We're still in October. The Jack O' Lanterns are yet to be lit, the Bonfires are yet to be burnt, we've just had a glorious Indian summer of a week and the half-term holiday is barely over. So, of course, the shops are full of Christmas tinsel and tat. Yes, it's that time of year again. Selection boxes, sleigh bells, glitter, chesnuts roasting on an open fire, miseltoe and wine, the boys of the NYPD choir, snow falling all around us, (just like the ones we used to know), everybody having simply wonderful fun. Oh, I wish it could be Christmas every day (don't worry, at this rate it soon will be).
And yet, there is a refuge. A haven. A shelter from the storm of all this madness. The library. No subliminal pressure to buy loads of cheap rubbish that you'll never use; no pushing and shoving and fights over a parking place; no mince pies (your local council has a healthy eating policy), no sickly smell of sherry (ditto drinking); no middle-aged staff painfully trying to get into the party spirit by wearing reindeer antlers or dressing as elves (well, not all the time) and no piped music playing Slade 653 times a day. Just a rather dog eared collection of Christmas books sat inconspicuously in a corner like they have every year for the past three decades (I've always felt that "Fanny Craddock's Christmas Cooking" is one for the ages). Bliss.
So if you're one of those people for whom Christmas has somehow lost true meaning, check out your library. You'll find peace on earth and goodwill to all in abundance.
Roll on Easter. . . .

That was the week that was

Did you know that we have just had Customer Service Week? And soon it will Family Learning Week? We will also be celebrating Global Entrepreneurship Week. I seem to have missed Chocolate Week (12th October) although I am looking forward to Farmhouse Breakfast Week (24th Jan 2010) and National Curry Week (22nd November). I'm also already clearing a month in my diary for National Bed Month, next March, although whether my long suffering employers will allow me a duvet month remains to be seen. There are a few which do not appeal - National Be Nice To Nettles Week (I kid you not - see www.nettles.org.uk - 19th May 2010) and World Maths week, to name but two.
From doughnuts to cancer research, owls to head lice, doodling to kidneys, there is a day, a week, or a month for almost everything you could possibly think of, and quite a few you probably couldn't. And as a dutiful librarian I do a display, get some books, organise a workshop, put up posters, but I can't help thinking, when is our week? Perhaps you have one already - if so let me know!
Yes we have storytelling week, World Book Day, poetry day, but none of them quite sum up what a wondrous place your library is! Other countries have library weeks - we should have one too! Write to the MLA! Write to CILIP! Write to your MP! Let's have a Library Week!
And for all you people from veggies to bacon lovers, science nuts and weathermen, gardeners and coffee-morning-cookie-cutters, it's payback time - we put your posters up, time for you to return the favour!

Get your fix here!

My name is Dorothea, and I'm addicted to....books. Not the most fashionable addiction, you will agree - I don't go to parties and swap books in the toilet (though I have been known to read books at a party). Kate Moss is seldom snapped leaving a nightclub with a book under her arm. And yet everyone has their vice, and books are mine. I'm not alone in this, either. Many of my regulars have the tell-tale glint in the eye and fevered brow when their favourite author has a new one on the horizon. Many a borrower has said to me "I can't get through the weekend without one." A future without reading matter is bleak indeed. This explains why many an addict has a stockpile, just in case.
I am not ashamed to say that I am a dealer too - my job means that I can store a choice one under the counter for my best customers "on the house" - a prime cut of the latest mind-bending fiction. Time-travel? A panacea for an aching soul? Uppers? Downers? Just to pass the timers? Get them all here!
Like all addictions, it is best started young for maximum impact. I wouldn't rule out the school gates. Even the cradle. You see, the more people who get addicted to books, the better. It's good for you. Even doctors are prescribing them now, and libraries are the dispensaries.
Next time you need a fix, see your librarian. We are fully qualified to diagnose and offer a tailored solution. Can't do your homework? This book might help. Long flight? Try this thriller. Nothing on the telly? This might pass the time.
Go to your library. Speak to an expert. It's a lot cheaper than hanging around on street corners.
And librarians, share your passion. There is plenty to go around.

Shhhh!

Haven't posted for a few days - things have been a little frenzied. Last Thursday we appeared at the Ilkley Literature Festival with our performance piece "Shhhh!". At last, the culmination of months of blood, toil, tears and sweat. We arrived in Ilkley ridiculously early and paid a visit to the famous Betty's Tea Rooms for a bite to eat (a haven of tranquility - the calm before the storm). We rolled up to the playhouse at 7.00pm and gave out flyers to the people who were there for the main events. "We're on at 9," we said, "It's called 'Shhhh!' and it's about libraries!" Most people took a flyer but we got a few blank looks.
Then a long wait for the other events to finish. We nipped into the bar and ordered two pints of Dutch Courage, then thought better of it and had tea instead. Laura, our liaison lady, told us that the average audiences for Fringe events had been about 30, though a few nights before they'd only had 6. "We're pros," we said, "We'll give it our all whether we've got 6 or 60." In the end it was 60 (60+ actually). The audience was fantastic. We'd a few friends and supporters but the response was so positive from everyone.
Our time on stage seemed to pass in a blur - it seemed very strange to be performing in front of a real audience after months practicing in front of nobody. Somewhere at the back of the audience we heard quite a lot of "knowing" laughs at certain points. Librarians. I'd stake my life on it. After we'd finished, the techie from the playhouse told us it was the best Fringe event he'd seen this year. We were chuffed.
So that was it. All over. It seemed a shame, after all our work, to just perform the piece once. We'd quite like to take it out on the road, performing it at libraries. Our idea is to perform the show (it lasts about 45/50 mins) then break for refreshments and then run a "reminiscence workshop" where people share their memories and stories of libraries. Any libraries out there interested or want to know more details? Just drop us a line at - sbond@wakefield.gov.uk.

In the meantime, thanks to everyone and anyone for supporting us at Ilkley. The show is over but the blog goes on!

Festival! Carnival!

Off to the heady world of the literature festival on Thursday - aside from the appearance of Shhhh! (if I'm not ready now then I never will be) - there is the glitz and the glamour of the festival! Real authors! In the flesh! Shiny new books which said author is desperately hoping you will buy so s/he can inscribe them with a fat Mont blanc pen bought ready for the occasion! The book shops with goods piled high saying "buy me" and "try me." Rubbing shoulders with the literati - you never know who you might see downing a crafty cream bun in Bettys.
Ah, I hear you say, a far cry from those tatty old paperbacks, half empty shelves and dog-eared magazines I leave behind in the library - no doubt I will be starstruck and not a little sorry to go back to work. Well, no actually. You see, it's all very well being beguiled into buying an £18.99 hardback, until you get home and realise that half the material was recycled from the authors' last book, and also the author has written "To Dorothea" in great big letters so you can't give it to Auntie Elsie for Christmas. It's all very well sitting at the back of a draughty hall not quite being able to hear about the character motivation for an experimental novel about samurai warriors and coming out no wiser than when you went in. Besides, some great writers go to libraries too. I bet many of the people doing the festival rounds started off in their local library. You should go along to yours and see what's happening - you might get a free cuppa. And you can return the books when you have finished with them. Not a writer alive could do without the library. Festival Shmestival! Libraries are where it's at!
Or am I just annoyed because I couldn't get a ticket for Alan Bennett?
Anyway more festival reports to come.
Who has been in your library recently?

"Shhhh!" at Ilkley Playhouse, Thurs 15th Oct, 9pm (the countdown)

Just 5 days to go to the world premiere of "Shhhh!:Love, Life and the Truth About Libraries" at the Ilkley Literature Festival and the tension is mounting. The script is (more or less) finished, rehearsals are "progressing" (ahem), props have been assembled, lines learnt, bridges burnt, there's a whiff of greasepaint, a rustle of curtains and the glare of the footlights is calling, calling, calling as the days, hours, minutes tick away, the moment of truth approaches and we are lead towards an overwhelming question - is the world truly ready for THE TRUTH about libraries? What Pandora's Box might we open by revealing it? What forces will be unleashed, what foundations will tremble? Who knows but that on Friday morning we will awaken in a new place, our paradigms shifted, our zeitgeist zonked, our times a'changed our world turned upside down, all changed, changed utterly, a terrible beauty born.

Just hope we get a bloody audience.

Cafe au Library?

It seems to be a great trend amongst the powers that be at the moment to suggest that every library worth its salt has a cafe attached. Indeed, some of the best libraries do have cafes, and this is no bad thing. I quite like the idea of arriving to the smell of coffee, and Carrot Passion cake during tea break is not to be sniffed at, although my cardigan size may increase alarmingly. Neither do I object to possible spillages and sticky fingers - people may as well dribble and crumble cakes over MY (mine, my precious...mine) books here as well as at home.
My main gripe is that people will simply say - "Failing library? Let's put a cafe in!" Then all you have is a failing library with a cafe attached. The library should be the main attraction - if you can stay and enjoy a cup of skinny macchiato with chocolate whip and marshmallows then so much the better, but this should not be the reason people visit. Lure them in with the smell of coffee by all means, but keep them there with great library services, the books they want, and the environment to enjoy them in.
The other problem is what people expect from a coffee shop - we held a charity coffee morning a couple of weeks ago, and believe me, you may get over 500 coffee combos at Starbucks, but that's nothing compared to Mrs Ramsbottom and her "squeeze the teabag three times, stir it clockwise, put in three and a third teaspoons of sugar, then just a smidge of milk (semi-skimmed) (smidge being an ancient Yorkshire measurement) blue cup and matching unchipped saucer, and a rich tea biscuit, but not one from the end of the packet because they are always broken. Thank you kindly." I defy even the most experienced barista and tea pourer to satisfy her!
Now, where is my muffin tin?

Fin-tastic!

Thank you to everyone who has contacted me so far with weird and wonderful library stories. A strange theme is emerging, however. There seem to be an inordinate number of incidents involving fish. Yes, fish.

A perturbed library assistant recalls, among the many odd items left as bookmarks, a kipper. (And if you have any other odd bookmarks please let me know). A still traumatised library worker remembers being handed a carrier bag containing one book to be returned, plus a piece of cod. A smelly, unwrapped, piece of cod. The owner of which denied all knowledge and left it in the library. It is not known whether said library worker took it home for tea. Another librarian describes the elderly couple who come in every week and, lacking hearing aids, shout for the whole library to hear, "COD OR HADDOCK TONIGHT DEAR?" Elsewhere, fishnet stockings have also been found in a library book. Not sure why. Although they seemed to be unworn.

So keep the stories coming, fish related or otherwise, and be careful out there, for cod moves in mysterious ways, and libraries are truly strange plaices to be.

Borrow a book "wherever you are"

So, how long was it before someone came into your local library this morning, produced a library card from a different local authority and attempted to borrow books on it because "they said on the telly you could do it"? My first one happened at 10.21. Patiently, I explained that all I could do was accept their library card as ID and issue them with one of our own library cards. No problem, of course, but my borrower did seem a tad disappointed that we didn't have an all singing, all dancing "One card fits all" system. The idea of making libraries accessible to all is fine, upstanding and laudable but I do wish the Society of Chief Librarians would take a bit more care when putting out press releases and not create the impression that we are offering one kind of service when it's really another. Perhaps the spin doctors just got carried away. We're all politicians now ...

D-Day!

It was the day that was supposed to change the world of publishing, the world of books forever! D-Day! Dan day, that is. Dan Brown. And so, a couple of weeks on, how was it for you, dear reader? Did you have borrowers breaking down your doors to download "The Lost Symbol"? Were they rushing in to plug in their new Sony Readers, while your book stock sat wilting on the shelves? No, me neither. We have (at last count) sixty reservations. And rather fewer copies. So people will either have to wait patiently or go and buy it along with their groceries at Waitasmorritescobury's.
We have yet to get rid of all our cassette audiobooks - a new MP3 collection has been treated with suspicion in some quarters, enthusiasm in others. So what, fellow librarians, are we for? Do we slavishly follow the New Book World, as per the Bookseller and the literary chit-chat columns, or do we do what we do best - look over our spectacles (metaphorical or otherwise) and do a bit of cross-referencing before we decide that it is all over for the book. I won't light my bonfire just yet!

Acronym?

As you know, modern life is full of strange abbreviations, and it takes us all a while to get used to them. I'm still trying to work out what that young man from the photocopying company means when he puts LOL after his messages about our broken down machine. And I still have to bite back the urge to slap people when they they say PIN number - "IT STANDS FOR..." Ooh deep breath anyway.

A lady came in today with her elderly MIL (Mother-in-Law) and asked if we did videos anymore. Rather proud for once I said that we did not and now that the world has moved to MP4 and HD, libraries were still using those silver shiny things that will also no doubt soon be obsolete, but we had at least got rid of videos. Except fishing ones. Fishermen still have videos. I find this rather comforting. Anyway a few minutes later said MIL came to counter.

"My VD's not working yet love", she said "but it should be up and running soon, so I've come out to get something for it." Call me old-fashioned, and many people have, but the first thing that leaps to mind when someone says VD, is, well, VD. Was there perhaps a new virus going about that was set to a timer, and this poor lady was desperately seeking a cure before it started to work? And why come to the library? The nearest I could get to a cure for syphilis was a mercury thermometer.

"Will this work?" she said, and put a DVD case on the counter. "Er, yes" I said, with relief.

Proud and Prejudiced.....

Ah, Jane. The divine Jane, dear aunt Jane. Ms Austen. It is a truth universally acknowledged that no other writer has inspired such idolatrous enthusiasm. Her appeal knows no bounds, cuts across all demographics, takes all sorts. Woe betides the hardy soul who dares to tangle with the Janeites - those redoubtable Trekkies of English Literature (perhaps somewhere there is a picturesque corner of a field where they gather to be inculcated into the cult en masse. Hampshire, probably). But where should the self respecting librarian shelve the books? Following months (weeks, days, minutes) of earnest discussion Dorothea suggests the following possibilities:

1) CLASSICS - Jane is class, her novels are classics. They must be becuase the characters all wear bonnets. And wet shirts. Well, they do on the BBC.

2) CHICK LIT - Jane rebranded. Edgy Jane, "contemporary" Jane, post-modern Jane. Chuck her in amongst the pink and glitter - the 30something -singleton Sex and the City renegades will gobble her up.

3) ROMANTIC FICTION - Stick 'em next to the Mills and Boon. It's basically the same thing. Not universally acknowledged but true all the same.

4) THE MARK TWAIN SOLUTION - "Any library is a good library that does not contain a volume by Jane Austen. Even if it contains no other book."

The choice is yours . . . . .

Dorothea has been in touch with Simon for the latest on the Ilkley Literature Festival and his forthcoming performance of "Shhh!" an epic drama in one act which is inspired by life in our public libraries.

Simon: "Last week we had to go to a planning meeting at Ilkley. We got to see the stage and space we will be using and to meet other performers at the Fringe festival. As I looked at the darkened theatre I seemed to hear a voice saying "This is real, this is happening, you'll be on that stage in 5 weeks!" Gulp.

We've been trying to start a bit of a publicity drive and visited Ilkley library, asking if we could leave a poster. "It's about libraries," I said. "About what it's really like to work in them." The staff were very friendly and welcoming. A lady smiled and said, "At last!" and a chap behind the counter said, "Will it have all the sex, drugs and rock and roll?" I answered in the affirmative. A lovely library and lovely staff - hope some of them can make it to the show.

On Sunday we popped into Leeds Central Library and asked if we could leave a poster. "It's about libraries - we're exposing the truth!" I said with a wry smile. The librarian frowned and shook her head with a weary sigh. "Oh no you're not," she said, and the years of experience on the front line seemed etched across her face. "Oh yes we are," we said, "We work in libraries too."
"Do you really? Do you really have to put up with the same things as us? Really?" she said. And a light seemed to go on in her eyes - a bright, shining light that said SOMEONE ELSE KNOWS. SOMEONE ELSE UNDERSTANDS.

So librarians of the world (or at least of West Yorkshire)- come and see "Shhh!" at Ilkley on October 15th. Becuase someone else knows. Someone else feels your pain.

It's for yoo-hoo!

What do you do with mobile phone users once they enter the hallowed portals? I have noticed four general tactics when I have visited libraries:
1) the patented Dorothea stare - this usually works, but takes years of practice to hone. I can nail a mosquito at 30 yards.
2) uncomfortable shuffling and surreptious looks followed by member of staff sidling over and asking in an embarrassed sort of way if they would mind, you know, er, turning it off, it is, you know, a library, right?
3) the stroppiest member of staff being sent over to tell them in no uncertain terms to switch it off before it gets flushed down the toilet.
4) studiously ignoring them in the hope that they will see sense and retreat - this never works.

Or do you have a tolerance zone, a chill out area, where people can bleep and chirrup and tweet in freedom? I bet you can guess what Dorothea thinks of that.

Dorothea has been having a chat with Simon, our intrepid librarian who is busily preparing for his appearance at the Ilkley Literature Festival and the world premiere of "Shhhh!" his one man show inspired by the world of libraries. So Simon, how is it going?

Simon: "Well, the rough draft of the script is finished and intensive rehearsals start in earnest this week. The Ilkley programme is officially out and Melvyn Bragg is in town on the same night as me! I'd invite him along to the show if I could figure out a way to contact him - anyone out there know him? I'm sure he's a chap with a passion for libraries. Melvyn, if you're out there, please come along!"

As for Simon's hopes and fears for "Shhhh!" the stage show:

Simon: "It was famously said that Beckett's 'Waiting for Godot' is a play in which nothing happens twice. I want "Shhhh!" to take theatre beyond Beckett; I want to break down barriers, shift paradigms, alter the demographic and generally kick ass. Yes, "Shhhh!" is a play in which nothing happens six times.
Just like a typical day at the library really. But remember - there's no place quite like a library when nothing happens ......"

You want what?

I've had to answer some very strange questions over my library career - here are a few examples:

Where can I get a divorce?
Will you publish my memoirs?
What will these seeds grow into?
What colour paint goes with these cushion covers?
Do you sell condoms?
Would you open the automatic doors for me - I'm an eco warrior and I don't want to be responsible for using the energy?

And because I'm a good and dutiful librarian I try to answer them all!
Here are the answers, in no particular order - marijuana, a lawyer, no, yes, no, magnolia.

Have you ever been asked anything odd?

What do you call them?

Please help Dorothea!
You know when that certain sort of person comes in, usually a woman, usually with kids in tow, and asks for biographies. Well, you know what she means, but if you are anything like Dorothea you take them to where the lives of Leonardo da Vinci, Stanley Matthews, Winston Churchill, Mohammed Ali are shelved. About five minutes later they come back. "No it's biographies we want. There is one about someone called Dave, I think." And so you take them to the shelves where the books are mainly white, with a distressed looking child on the front clutching a teddy bear, and with titles like "Please No Mummy Don't Sell Me To The White Slavers, At Least Not Until Daddy Has Beaten Me Again." And they are delighted. I am waiting for the first memoir called "Mummy Took Me To The Library And Left Me There While She Read Books About Neglected Children."
Anyway what Dorothea wants to know is, what do you call them? I've scoured libraries and bookshops and so far we have:

Misery Literature
Real Lives
Alternative Childhoods
Painful Lives

Please send your suggestions.

What counts?

Dorothea is stressed this week, for it is the week we have to count who comes in and out of our dear little library. We do this every week electronically, but just occasionally we have to actually sit down and do it properly (except during tea breaks, obviously - everything stops for tea and biscuits). Unless it is too busy to count - then of course we have an interesting paradox, for if we are are too busy to count then we count no-one, so we are not busy at all. And so, from morning until evening, someone sits and clicks a clicker, for a child, or for an adult. This raises some interesting existential problems - if 16 is an adult, how old is that girl with the high heels and the lippy? Do workmen count? Delivery people? Do I count a member of staff who has been out for lunch? Joanne's mum who has come to see her daughter who works in the office? Who, actually, is a person? Does the double buggy contain children or shopping - and how close can I get without seeming rude? The nice but forgetful old lady who comes in five times within half an hour - is that one visit or five?
Also, does it matter what they do here? Does someone spending six hours here count for more than someone who spends five minutes?
Statistics, make of them what you will - all I know is, I need a cup of tea. And a biscuit. With chocolate on.

Towards the Fringe

Dorothea has been reading the latest edition of the CILIP Gazette where you can find an article about Simon, our intrepid librarian, and his 60 minutes of fame on the 4th Plinth. Now, however, he has other fish to fry, namely his forthcoming one man show at the Ilkley Literature Festival. It's called "Shhh" and its all about libraries. Dorothea caught up with Simon and asked him how the preparations are going:

"Very well, thank you. Performance date is October 15th at 9pm which is a very, very long way off. Isn't it? Please? Really?"

Dorothea thinks that Simon is just a tad nervous but you know what they say, 'It'll be alright on the night'.Still, Simon tells me he'll be attending a meeting for all the "Fringers" on 3rd September and will keep us posted on any developments. Meanwhile the first draft of his script is finished but he still needs your funny library stories. So let's hear them oh citizens of Libraryland!

For now, Dorothea will give you a starter for 10. This very week Dorothea took a phone call from someone asking the library to re-house their pets!! Anyone out there had any other suitably bizarre requests in the library? We're waiting for your call....

The day job

Follow the link http://www.oneandother.co.uk/participants/Simon to see what a librarian can do in an average day - reading to any audience, big or small - sharing a book with a hundred people, or just five. Anyone can do it - you don't have to be on a plinth!

Miss-communication

I've been gathering stories all week to give to our librarian, and here is small one I thought I would share with you. Man walks into library, and asks at the enquiry desk for books about beetles. Library assistant points him to the music books. A few minutes later he comes back - "no, books about beetles, not beatles." Library assistant gently explains that the Beatles are a pop group, and heads back to the music section. "No" says the man. "Beetles." And out comes a matchbox. And it does not contain Paul McCartney.

Do you have a story to share?

From the plinth to the fringe

Welcome one and all to this new libraries and books blog. I am Dorothea, and I'm (almost) all woman, but most particularly, all librarian. Whatever that means. I hope over the coming weeks and months to share many stories with you - stories of libraries, of books, borrowers, and lenders (of which I am both, with apologies to Polonius). And I hope you will share your stories with me.


My first story begins on the 9th of July, when a librarian took to the plinth in Trafalgar Square, and told a few tales, read a few poems, and stood up for books, for reading, and for libraries. The librarian loved being on the plinth, and had a great response from people far and wide who said how wonderful it was that people were talking about libraries, and reading, about how they loved libraries and books, and how it was about time someone stood up for them.



This made the librarian think that perhaps more people in more places had stories to tell, and things to say about libraries, and experiences to share, and were perhaps simply lacking the means or the mouthpiece to do it. After all, not everyone is willing or able to stand in the middle of London and shout about reading, and books, and libraries. I, for instance, am very shy, and much prefer to stay behind my library counter. But I and my colleagues told the librarian some stories, over a cup of tea, and the librarian thought that perhaps other people might like to hear our stories too, and so, with some trepidation, our heroic librarian decided to perform at the Ilkley Literature Festival fringe, and to be the mouthpiece for book and library lovers throughout the world, and tell some stories of these fantastic institutions and the people who frequent them.



And then, our hero, our brave, adventurous librarian, began to panic! "What if I don't have enough to say?" "What if no-one wants to hear about books and libraries anymore in this digital age?" and also, "What will I say if I bump into Alan Bennett in the wings?"



Dorothea to the rescue! For from my library counter, or my comfortable laptop at home, I can contact librarians, and book lovers throughout the world! They might have stories and experiences they are willing to share, or would like other people to hear. They may encourage and hearten you with their own passion for libraries and books.



So, book-lovers, library-lovers, librarians, page-turners, spine-breakers, book-stampers, indexers, card-fillers, dewey-dames, and dewey-dudes, please share your stories and experiences of libraries with Dorothea. She, like all the best librarians, can be trusted not to tell (or at least to change the names if she does). She will pass on the best to our brave librarian, who may in turn use them in the show at Ilkley. All anecdotes, however small, are welcome. All Joycean narratives of life in libraries will be read with pleasure. Libraries are changing - tell your tales now, or they may be lost forever. And our brave librarian will be able to go to Ilkley in October knowing that other people care, and want their stories to be heard.



This blog will be an archive of your stories, as well as a talking shop and a sounding board. It will also tell the story of our librarian hero and his journey from the plinth to the fringe.